My Fear, My Life, My Love
by SpringThunder
Summary: Kaoru-Kenshin - one-shot - Read as Kaoru Kamiya witnesses the deathmatch battle between Kenshin and Saitoh at the Kamiya Dojo. Sweet and Short.


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Unfortunely, I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or whatever characters that appear in that AWESOME anime.

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My Fear, My Life, My Love

Fear.

Everything can be summed into that one single word. 

First of, I could not believe that I could have been so easily fooled by the disguise he had on. Saitoh – the man who pretended to come in peace was the one who wanted Kenshin's death. And here I was, hoping that he would actually help with Kenshin's "so-called" stalker.

However, that all soon became trivial. 

  
He wanted to fight. From the moment I saw him pull out that Japanese sword that hung from his waist, I knew from then he was someone different, someone we have never faced before – no where near it. And I hate it when my inhibitions are right, because they usually are.

And what was worse, Kenshin actually stepped forward, accepting this fight. I couldn't believe my eyes. He was actually going to go through with this, and something told me that this fight would be a turning point – in what? – I did not know at that time. All that mattered was his safety.

So he had stepped forward, and before he could take another step, I grabbed his gi. I had to show him that I was still here – that I needed him badly. I did not want to be alone again.

  
He told me not to worry about him, but what else can I do when he always put himself in these types of situations. I knew that once Kenshin's mind was made up, he was not going to turn away. 

And then he was gone.

I felt nothing in my hand and it took me quite awhile to realize that he was facing Saitoh head on. 

Then, as the orange sun flew down the horizon, and the dojo was covered with shadows, it began.

Before I had time to realize, Saitoh had unleashed his first attack on Kenshin, with speed only comparable to the techniques of the Hiten Mitsurugi Style. 

Relief spread through me when Kenshin took to the air. I knew from previous encounters that he was going to use the Ryuu Sou Sen attack and Saitoh, and hopefully, everything would be over. Yahiko did not have to tell me that.

  
However……my worst fears came to life. Saitoh thrusted upward with his sword, and Kenshin gave a gasp – the first I have ever heard from him in battle.

Right then and there, everything inside me clicked. Right then and there, I realized that my life was nothing without the rurouni to guide me. Right then and there, I realized, I was in love with the red-headed ex-manslayer. 

Tears poured out of my eyes as they showed me Kenshin being pierced by Saitoh's sword. He could be dead when I just realized the most important thing in my life.

I could not believe that Kenshin was about to leave this world, when I had just found out that I loved him.

However, that split second later, Kenshin was on the ground, breathing labored drastically as he clutched an area on his upper body that obviously was injured. Saitoh loomed only a few spaces behind him, explaining his past – a past I could have cared less for.

I wanted to hit the stupid rurouni for actually getting up, and taking another hit from Saitoh's blade. I knew that if I did not intervene, Kenshin would die.

And I actually jumped in front, hoping that maybe, just maybe, my presence in front of my beloved would have some kind of effect. How stupid could I have been?

Apparently, it had none. 

  
I felt a hand on my shoulder as Kenshin walked forward. The bangs of his hair were covering his eyes, so I could not see any expression. He went forward to fight. Desperately, I reached for him one more time, ending in vain as I only caught air.

Kenshin repeatedly took blows from Saitoh, despite the fact he was moving quicker. 

Tears were pouring out of my eyes, but I could care less of who saw them. The rurouni was my one and only concern. 

Then, my second worst fear came to life. 

Just when I thought Kenshin was surely to die, he got up after the fourth assault from Saitoh, looking very much changed. His hair was let loose over his face, but his eyes clearly stood out. That yellow, wolf-like, eyes that shined through the darkness.

He was the battousai once again. 

And I knew all was lost. 

My Kenshin was gone.

I cried out loud, hoping it would distract the two, but like everything else I did, it was futile.

Before I could blink back my tears, Saitoh and Kenshin were blurs, only the sounds of their swords hitting each other was the only clue I had that Kenshin was still alive, even though he was battousai. 

I cried out, asking anyone to stop this mad fight. However, when Sano appeared with Megumi-dono, and when he explained this fight was not in Tokyo anymore, but in Kyoto, during the revolution, all hope within me died. 

Somebody was going to die tonight.

In my dojo.

Both men were on the ground before I knew it, swords on the floor. Saitoh was using his fists while Kenshin was using the sheath of his reverse-blade sword. 

"This is it," I told myself. The next attack would determine the course of my life.

And the two of them charged……………

……………………………………………………..

………….and before I knew it, they had stopped only centimeters away from each other.

That night, followed by the next week – May fourteenth – would change my life forever. 

That night, I discovered my true feelings for the rurouni, even though I had tried to deny them for so long. 

  
And he would leave me at the river the next week, crying. 

In the end, I did not reveal my true feelings. Why? I did not know.

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Author's Notes: Well, there you have it. My first Rurouni Kenshin fan-fic. I am totally in love with this anime show, and couldn't resist writing a story of my own. 

I was surprised when I couldn't find many fics about the first encounter between Saitoh and Kenshin. I had always thought that was the start of the **_turning point_**. More people rather focus on the "Sayonara scene," as they call it, which doesn't bother me.

Anyway, I know this is a pretty short fic, but I do hope to start a lengthy Kenshin fic in the near future when I am done with Eternal Struggle.

So, I hoped you liked it and please, **LEAVE A REVIEW! ^_^** It would be much thanked

-vindemon64


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